Just note to Anonymous first: I kept imagining that beeping sound from the takeaway was going to happen on my walk home. (ahah, hell yeah, can imagine that was freaaakkkyl) Was convincing myself a minialienspyship was following me around occasionally reporting hidden messages to it’s home planet trillions of light years away. (I completely agree with that theory and think we should right a detailed paper on the matter. )
Also, WordPress is now a shortcut for me, right next to Tetris 🙂 (of course! quality shortcutting my friend)
This will go in ‘Random Rantings of a Speck-filed mind’ if you know how to put it there. (somehow completed it!)
NEW YEARS RESOLUTION
Once upon a time in a galaxy far far away I stopped giving a shit what other people thought and decided to talk in my own way. (its a great way) As you may have guessed, I’m not actually referring to some alternate version of reality here. I’m talking about the here and now. About me.
My language will be that of truth. I’ll say what I want to say when I want to say it. For example that happily ever garbage I just spouted. I said that because I felt like it and I personally found it funny. (it was) Freeing too; speaking your mind.(Amen sister) Though in a way I guess not, because I’m trying too to be ‘myself’ that I’ve just created my own chains.
I can talk in everyday code when I want to. I know to say “fine, you?” when I really mean “terrible but you don’t care and I don’t want you to”. I know to nod graciously when I receive the same reply. (Social routines, gotta love ’em)
“Excuse me” is not-so-secretly “get out of my way”.
“Thanks, I love it” actually means “Thank god, you remembered the receipt this time.”
But we don’t say that. Because we don’t want to hurt people’s feelings. Even if this is the tenth useless thingy-ma-bob that sticks to the fridge they’ve bought you. Even if the world is all black-and-blue from trying to apologise it refuses to stop.
That’s what sets us apart from the animals; the lengths we go to lying to ourselves that sugar coating makes life better. When we all know it rots your teeth and makes you sick from the inside out. We get angry when people lie to us but we do it everyday in our head and our hearts. So I’ve made the informed decision to stop. I saw what we’d become and realised it was a joke.
So I’m going to start treating life in the way it deserves to be treated.
“Again I must remind you that:
A dog’s a dog, a cats a cat.”
T.S. Elliot, The Ad-Dressing of Cats
(good times, good book)
So I’m going to start having fun, treat it how it be, yaknow?
I might even make a glossary, all the everyday lies I notice. All the things that just mean another. Obviously I’m not going to call people up on this. It’s bollocks, but society needs it to function.
I’m just gonna enjoy stepping out of it for a while and taking a look at things. Behind a glass shield, hidden from the rest. Understanding the barrier between us.
Doubt it’ll take me long to fall back into the monotonous pattern of stepping on my own toes to get out of others way.
I’ll see if I can send a report from the other side, adios amigos.
Be back soon, no doubt.
Wish me luck? (the best luck of all luck)
(Loving the New Years Resolution, and number theme.)